Numb

In the End by Linkin Park is playing in the back ground. Some parts of the song are ringing some bell in my thoughts but then again I realized i am numb with how things are going in my corporate life. I may have not been that lucky with my current job (until tomorrow) I am blessed with other great stuff like family, loved one and friends. Sing aloud if you ever feel you have been treated unfairly in your office jobs.

The bold parts in the lyrcis struck me most as i enjoy my last two days in this office.

(It starts with)
One thing, I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It’s so unreal
Didn’t look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on but didn’t even know
Wasted it all just to
Watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
One thing, I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme
To remind myself how
I tried so hard
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I’m surprised it got so (far)
Things aren’t the way they were before
You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end
You kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I’ve put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I’ve put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter

Soon i realized that the title i thought was wrong, but apparently Linkin Park has the song numb too. I am numb to the feeling of letting go of all the sacrifices, efforts and hard work i did for the past 5 years. Cheers to unemployment tomorrow after COB and hello Boracay Islands for vacation. I will resume job hunting after a well rested vacation.

New Beginnings

2011, a start of a new decade. As I depart from my comfort zone and venture to the unknown and uncertain real life, I take with me positive energies to help me get through the challenges I am about to face.

All good things come to an end at one point in time, but better have it ended than not experience the good stuff at all.

As a new decade, I am rethinking of what i want for the rest of my life or at least the next few years. As a starter, i hope to revive the blogging hobby i had before. So here’s a new post. Another thing is that I am finding a new job, (if you have a job to refer for a business graduate with 5-6 years working experience, please let me know) a new role to play in the corporate aspect of my life. The part of my life that will give fuel to do future things.

I find it hard to let go of the curent comfort zone i have but i am willing to risk and seek more possibilities out there. All im sure is that even if it’s a new decade, I wont let go of the close and true friends i had. I will be forever grateful of the ups and downs of friendships and all the memories in between. It’s because of them that I have developed to be a responsible and mature individual and they are among the pillars of strength (aside from God, family and loved one) when everything seems to be lost and unfair.

The past has made me realize that even you do your best, it will never be enough as life can be unfair at times. I dunno if this is true but to be successful, you need to kiss-ass or be a crab among your peers. However, i do not think i could do that, i am happy and content that I am moving forward knowing that I did my best and never wronged anyone just to be ahead and be safe.

I will never be certain what the future holds for me but I am sure, that everything will fall into the right place at the right time. I am positive that the changes i am about to undergo will help me find my purpose in life.

So i as i venture to the unknown, new career, new blogging and new routines, cheers to new beginnings!

Mr. Brightside

This is not about the song of Killers. This is a post regarding looking on the brighter side of things.

I once received an email that the outcome of things looked on the brighter side produces greater results than being a pessimist.

There’s nothing wrong on being skeptic of the unforseeable future. We can always do contingency plans or back ups if the original fails.  Sometimes, it pays not to loose hope until the very end. After all, best results doesn’t come in handy. You need to put a lot of determination and hard work to succeed.

So what am i so positive about? I am positive that soon enough things will go on as planned for me. A happy and positive disposition has done me good for the first 24 yeras of my life. So i firmly believe that I would do well and achieve my goals soon.

OMG. Is this the middle life crisis I am having? hahahaha.

Just like Mariah and Whitney sang, there can be miracles when you believe, though hope is frail, it’s hard to kill.

Wag Makulit

Sinabi ng wag makulit e.

This is the line i am telling my heart and mind now. Yes, you got that right. I am officially on the stage of infatuation.

Biruin mu yun hinde pa rin nauubos ang attraction sa katawan ko. After all the heart aches and heart pains that i’ve been through eto na naman ako. Enough is enough. Un lang kaya ko ba tong panindigan?

Grrr. Why does it have to be this way? When i am on the verge of accepting friendship at its truest sense there are these super perfect-timing circumstances that makes me feel excited and infatuated.  Pwede naman ako hinde matuwa or maapektuhan bakit ganito? hahaha.

Hirap talaga lumandi, madalas talo ka kapag umabot na sa puntong gusto mo na sya, e sya nakikipaglandian pa lang.

Higher standards on crushes and friends? Null effect on me. Still the same result. I am infatuated.

Ganito ba ang feeling kapag lagpas ka nang isang taon na single? marami crush? hahaha.

Well on the good side of it, if you are infatuated you have a happy disposition and inspired. Yun na lang iisipin ko, i’m infatuated for me to strive better and harder… to make my  crush fall for me. bwahahaha.

As you can see, wala ng pag -asa. Malandi talaga.

Para sau **** aka ******, kainis ka. Wag mu ako akitin. Hinde ko kaya labanan. hahaha. See you around. 😀

Will History Repeat Itself?

In the past weeks that passed after my dreaded busy season (packed with tons of benefits) i was coerced to commute on my way home. Hinde pa ako milyonaryo para mag taxi pauwi na hinde sponsored.

There is nothing wrong in commuting. In fact, i enjoy commuting. My only fear is that, here i go again, my only convenient way of getting in and out of makati is through service shuttles. Wala naman issue dun d b? The thing is, i get close to some of them more than i should be. I am not sure if there is a law or guideline to limit one’s interaction with one another. The scenario is like this, i end up being one of the last passengers or i am seated beside the owner of the van. Then it begins. The conversation starts, then laughters and a good time. Nothing wrong with that. But then here comes to exchanging numbers. Pwede naman hinde mag reply kapag may nag text but out of hiya, a conversation starts. And before you know it, close na kami.

E anu naman kung close na kami. Eto na ung point. Masasanay ako. If i missed a day not riding their van or a miss in reply then I would start to miss them. OA? True. Yan ang hinde ko maintindihan sa sarili ko. Adik. Yes, tulad ng Adik Sa’yo ng GMA. Un nga lang sa totoong buhay.

So will history repeat itself for me? I dunno for now. Pero ayaw ko sana. Dati naman kuntento na ako na makauwi ako bakit ngaun may parang kurot na gusto lage na sumabay? hahaha. malandi ba? wala ako magagawa.

Damn, i really have to get my own car. It will eliminate the possibility of interacting with them, the leser chance of falling in infatuation. Pero hinde ko rin ginagawa. Di rin ako bibili or if meron malamang e mag co-commute pa rin ako.

And i don’t think that history will repeat itself, before the thing that i had with the shuttle guy was only clear to both of us, now we have several friends and co-passengers who happen to know the bonding and friendship that is transpiring.

So ok, this is not like the last time. Will it end the same or in a much sweeter tone? ASA.

Daily dose of landi at kilig e siguro pwede na. kaya wag na palalain. here i go again. help!

New Home

After almost living in our family house in Manila for 25 years, i will finally move out. To where? I am still searching.

I am looking for a room for rent or a cheap apartment either in Manila or Makati. Any help is highly appreciated. 🙂

Buzz me.

Manny Pacquiao and Our Taxes

yeah, yeah, yeah. Manny Pacman Pacquiao won over Ricky Hatton. Most Filipinos have supported the pambansang kamao on his latest title fight. Even if the match lasted for barely 2 rounds, Filipinos rejoiced on Manny’s triumph. Congratulations…

And the Filipinos where back to the reality of their own problems.

Days passed.

President GMA decided to give Pacman a ceremonial thank you through a motorcade in major routes in the metro. It should have been last Friday, then moved to today (Monday) and i am not sure if it was rescheduled on Wednesday.

A plastic ribbon colored with Red, Blue and White were printed with the congratulations and bayaning Pilipino note for Pacman. It was tied up on the threes, lamp posts, street signs, fences, bridges and everywhere and anywhere men in blue can get their hands on. This ribbon as others claim, would be the route for Manny’s motorcade.

On my way to work yesterday, i was surprised that all the roads that i pass through have these ribbons waving with all smiles at me. At first i was amazed on how the men in blue were able to put these ribbons in places you can’t think of. But i suddenly realized that, the government (GMA) paid for these ribbons. Yes, the red,blue and white ribbons are the taxes withheld from my salary. Damn.

That plastic thingy hanging around with all smiles at me, are there because, we normal tax payers are giving the government funds to peruse for whatever action they may think of.

Okay, I may be a little bit over-acting here, but come to think of it. After the motorcade, where will these ribbons go? Trash? Partly correct, it will just add up to pollution for sure.

Correct, nice thinking, the money we worked hard for, became ribbons then became rubbish.

Ang saya ‘di ba? Because we wanted to congratulate Manny for winning another title belt, we had our salaries withheld and  face to face see our money become waste.

Most Filipinos shelled out money just to watch Pacman fight for barely 2 rounds. It’s not worth it right? Then comes the govt that used our taxes paid for his wlecome celebration. The Govt could have hanged 1 kilo of rice or something else that may be beneficial for the majority. Not to mention, the possible super mega traffic this motorcade may bring about.

I am not a fan or Pacman nor someone who dislikes Manny, I am just a concerned citizen that was alarmed of the ribbons used and traffic i might encounter because of Pacman’s victory. If this would happen everytime Manny wins, then I hope for Pacman’s loss next time.

And BTW, after 2 rounds of the boxing, who became rich? pacman.

us? broken due to the live watching and double broken because taxes were used for the celebration, and super loser because, we normal citizens will bear the traffic Pamcan’s motorcade will cause.

Isn’t enough that almost everyone watched him fight? Do we really need to waste money to show we appreciate his winnings?

If you find this post rude, go ahead, vote Manny as Congressman of Saranggani.

Bring Me to Life

This is a shout out to myself to revive my blogging prowess.

It was almost half a year that i visited this one.

Any kind of help to revive my blog is well appreciated.

Proxy season (work) will soon be over and i hope to blog again.

Cheers to 2009!

Finally,  2008 will come to a close by tomorrow midnight! Yipee, a new year to look forward to, a new year to start things over and a new year of triumphs and failures. But as this year ends, i want to thank all those who in one way or another made me a better person. This time of the year would equate to a time of looking back, realizing the opportunities to grow and reminiscing what has transpired.

2008 was both a rewarding and challenging year for me, i might be sure which one outweighed the other, I am definite that i have no regrets for whatever happened this year.

As for a new year’s resolution, i can only think of one:

Don’t make a resolution.

Why? Because in history, I was able to maintain some of it and some sank in the drain.  For a change, instead of a resolution, I am making a wishlist for 2009.

– More shopping.  More Gadgets.  More fun.

– Enjoy single blessedness in a non-sensual manner.

-Invest and save at least 100K (Asa! pero, wish lang naman)

-Maturity in terms of career and everything about work (eto kase kulang sa evaluation ko na huli)

-more friends, i mean close, dear and true friends

-allowance for big purchases and moves

-BLOG.

hehehe. wala pa ako iba maisip, pero i’ll update as soon as may maisip ako.

For now,  A prosperous and happy new year to all! Cheers!

Sa uulitin po sa 2009 🙂

Season’s Greetings!

It’s the time of the year to greet my loved ones and friends a heart felt greeting this holidays.

I may have been silent and lazy to blog, but the friends I got here are dear to me still. Hopefully, when 2009 starts, my will to blog would be revived. 🙂

For now, I just want to wish you, your family and friends a Merry Christmas and a Bountiful New Year.

It’s not with the gifts nor the expenses, but the joy brought about by love, friendship and family  that is worth celebrating! 🙂 Cherish the people dear to you always, as you may not know until when they will still be there 😛

For those I haven’t met  personally, darating din tayo dyan! 🙂

Happy Holidays! 🙂