khentutz… R-E-A-D-I-N-G

January 20, 2011

Numb

In the End by Linkin Park is playing in the back ground. Some parts of the song are ringing some bell in my thoughts but then again I realized i am numb with how things are going in my corporate life. I may have not been that lucky with my current job (until tomorrow) I am blessed with other great stuff like family, loved one and friends. Sing aloud if you ever feel you have been treated unfairly in your office jobs.

The bold parts in the lyrcis struck me most as i enjoy my last two days in this office.

(It starts with)
One thing, I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It’s so unreal
Didn’t look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on but didn’t even know
Wasted it all just to
Watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
One thing, I don’t know why
It doesn’t even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind, I designed this rhyme
To remind myself how
I tried so hard
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I’m surprised it got so (far)
Things aren’t the way they were before
You wouldn’t even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end
You kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I’ve put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I’ve put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this
There’s only one thing you should know
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end
It doesn’t even matter

Soon i realized that the title i thought was wrong, but apparently Linkin Park has the song numb too. I am numb to the feeling of letting go of all the sacrifices, efforts and hard work i did for the past 5 years. Cheers to unemployment tomorrow after COB and hello Boracay Islands for vacation. I will resume job hunting after a well rested vacation.

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January 19, 2011

New Beginnings

Filed under: Rumbles and Grunts — khentutz @ 6:16 am
Tags: ,

2011, a start of a new decade. As I depart from my comfort zone and venture to the unknown and uncertain real life, I take with me positive energies to help me get through the challenges I am about to face.

All good things come to an end at one point in time, but better have it ended than not experience the good stuff at all.

As a new decade, I am rethinking of what i want for the rest of my life or at least the next few years. As a starter, i hope to revive the blogging hobby i had before. So here’s a new post. Another thing is that I am finding a new job, (if you have a job to refer for a business graduate with 5-6 years working experience, please let me know) a new role to play in the corporate aspect of my life. The part of my life that will give fuel to do future things.

I find it hard to let go of the curent comfort zone i have but i am willing to risk and seek more possibilities out there. All im sure is that even if it’s a new decade, I wont let go of the close and true friends i had. I will be forever grateful of the ups and downs of friendships and all the memories in between. It’s because of them that I have developed to be a responsible and mature individual and they are among the pillars of strength (aside from God, family and loved one) when everything seems to be lost and unfair.

The past has made me realize that even you do your best, it will never be enough as life can be unfair at times. I dunno if this is true but to be successful, you need to kiss-ass or be a crab among your peers. However, i do not think i could do that, i am happy and content that I am moving forward knowing that I did my best and never wronged anyone just to be ahead and be safe.

I will never be certain what the future holds for me but I am sure, that everything will fall into the right place at the right time. I am positive that the changes i am about to undergo will help me find my purpose in life.

So i as i venture to the unknown, new career, new blogging and new routines, cheers to new beginnings!

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